Europe - 
Police have Miss Piggy under police guard after her friends Bert and Ernie were kidnapped. Miss Piggy was injured (but expected to make a full recovery) after burglars attempted to steal items from a Jim Henson Traveling Display currently touring Europe. Bert and Ernie (the original puppets) were valued at $125, 000. It is rumored that Miss Piggy escaped being kidnapped herself by holding off the burglars with her famous karate chops until police could respond to the museum alarm. No suspects are in custody at this time.

Vermont - 
Police in Rutland, Vermont and Piscataway, New Jersey charged men with assault in domestic fights, specifically, the act of head butting women. The N. J. case involved the president of the local school board, who reportedly got involved in a fight over what kind of bread should be used in a sandwich.

Illinois- 
James Scott of Fowler, Illinois was convicted of removing sandbags from a Mississippi River levee during the 1993 floods. The overflow he caused resulted in millions of dollars in damages and closed the only bridge connecting Missouri and Illinois for 1 00 miles. Scott said he removed the sandbags so he could have a party at his house on the Illinois side while stranding his wife on the Missouri side. The maximum sentence was handed down.

New York- 
Clarie Hurd of New York got more than she bargained for with her new personalized automobile plates. Hurd works as a temporary employee for several agencies. Excited about her job she requested the personalized plate "TEMP" for her car. It didn't take long (less than one month) for her to receive over 1,400 parking citations, issued in three states.

It seems that consistent with tradition, officers typically enter "temp" on citations when the vehicle has a temporary paper plate. You guessed it, Hurd received every "temp" citation issued in New York. While New York has straightened out the problem, New Jersey hasn't made any promises on how it will resolve this issue.

Nevada - 
Mirage Resorts, Inc parent company for Treasure Island Hotel and Casino tried to sign up a man called "Shoeless Joe" to make a movie about his weekend. It seems the elderly man (80ish) was down on his luck, walked into the Treasure Island Hotel with $400 in crumpled $5 and $10 bills. By the end of the evening, "Mister Shoeless Joe" was checked into a plush high roller room along with his $ 400,000 in winnings. "Joe" stayed one week, ran his money up to $1.3 million, and then lost it just a fast. At last report, Shoeless Joe quietly cashed in, checked out, and declined a movie career.

Oregon - 
An Oregon state trooper has saved a few lives by monitoring the citizen band radio in his patrol vehicle for reports of trouble. Recently the trooper was parked near North Bend, Oregon, when two tractor-trailers passed by, and their conversation on channel 10 "bled over" onto channel 9 the emergency frequency he was monitoring. The truckers were discussing if the cop knew the wooden pallets they were hauling had just been stolen! The truckers joked about whether they should give back the stolen goods or not. The trooper pulled onto the road in the opposite direction until he head that "the bear is going the other way". The trooper made a u-turn, followed at a discreet distance behind the truckers until backup arrived. When the truckers decided it was to late too give back the stolen pallets, the trooper used his "CB" radio to advise them, "Maybe you should have, when you could have! Now it is time to just pull over!" The arrest occurred without incident.

California - 
Police Officer Terry Webb spotted Jermiah Gerbracht, 55, and his dog Harley recently. Webb pulled them over, initially believing that Gerbracht was breaking the mandatory state helmet law. Gerbracht wears a leather top-hat with a helmet sewn on the inside. Once Webb realized that the helmet law had not be broken, Gerbracht was cited for transporting a dog on his motorcycle.

The 50 pound dog has been trained to straddle the leather upholstered gas tank. The vehicle code prohibits a "person" from riding on a part of a motor vehicle not intended for passengers. "Harley is not a person," Gerbracht stated, "But she is a lady." Sgt. Maarschalk quotes the law as saying "person" or "load". A load could mean a dog, he said.

"We think the Police Department is doggone great, don't we Harley?" Gerbracht said. The ticket though is a serious thing. "It's about a man, a dog and his motorcycle, but it's more about freedom," he added.

When Harley is on the motorcycle, she is protected by a specially designed dual heat shield preventing her paws and tail from being singed. She also has a place for her hind legs and nails. "She has a Perrier bottle filled with water," (mounted on the right handle bar) Gerbracht said. "She can always get a drink. I am the designated driver."

Gerbracht believes that if he is found guilty, Californians will see a major change in driving laws. "If we're found guilty, then Harley would be declared a person," he reasoned. "Then everybody can take their dog and use the car pool lane."

Only in California!